My brother was in town today and I asked him not to leave until I had a chance to talk to him in person. For conflicting schedules, he arrived in town in the morning and I am at the county fair all day teaching goat yoga then working one of the booths. I was also trying to get ahold of my sister to tell her too. It happened everyone was going to find out on the same day.
My brother took the news fairly well and matter-of-factly. I pretty much stated I don’t know much until I see the surgeon on Monday. I also said I was working on a referral to UW. He is good at accepting I am in the stage of gathering more information. I can’t know much else until more results come in.
Later my sister arrived. My brother was there as I told her. I had the report I received on Monday with the cancer diagnosis; officially invasive carcinoma. This was a bit scary for her because I could see her start to tear up. I explained yes, it is a bit frightening because it is labeled as invasive. I reminded her what Chris, the oncology nurse told me, the markers were going to be more of an indicator of my prognosis. Having the report of my diagnosis, though not fully completed, helped me tell my sister the news and next steps.
I am the eldest sibling. I think a diagnosis like breast cancer has caused a stressor on my sister. From now on, she will be a bit more at risk because she has an older sister with it. Going through all of this, I was asked by every healthcare provider family history. I can only report my paternal grandmother who was diagnosed with breast cancer in her 80’s. It feels intense because it is stressed if anyone is under 50. Well, I am 41 which means my sister may want to share this with any healthcare providers of her own as a precaution. I am sure she is concerned because I am her sister but this adds a bit of fear because it may happen to her as well. Honestly, no one has been genetically tested so it is unknown whether there is a familial history.
It was helpful for me to tell my siblings because I could practice talking about my condition in a way that was direct, factual, and managed an emotional response. The reaction of others has affected me. I don’t want to be scared so I don’t want others to be scared for me. People can have whatever emotions they want to have. I am going into this with an optimistic attitude and I hope others can show similar support. This isn’t going to be a fun time but I can make the best of what I can control. I believe having an optimistic outlook helps me take in more information and make choices moving forward.